User:Lackluster

=Lackluster Basics= "I started out as a young lad. Cold, alone, helpless, and partially naked. I was taken in by a pack of wild wolves. They cared for me, raised me to be a respectable person. Bringing me up with the will of the wild allowed me to stay strong, so when they later abandoned me (as I knew they would, stupid Pedro didn't want me getting Alpha Wolf) I could make it on my own. So I moved down to New York and tried my hand at my lifetime love, dancing. It was hard at first, but then again it always is. However, I stayed true and got a spot on the Christina Aguilera tour. It was there that I found my first computer.

I happened to stumble across a computer hacker in my adventures and he and I became close friends. Soon I abandoned the tour and left with him to seek our fame and fortune. He taught me his ways and I taught him how to love again. His name was Anir P. Finkleton. Soon we were met with horrible misfourtune. After a hack of the FBI database went wrong we were both caught and sentenced to twenty years in jail.

I learned a lot of things in jail, most of which I've tried to forget (except how to make your own toliet wine, it's really just delicious) but one thing has always stuck with me. You have to find a way to escape. So after being released I started up my new life, living life day by day. I bought a house, a computer, and a mail order bride from Russia. In her belonging she had brought World or Warcraft. Hence a new passion was born, a passion for a game. I played day and night. Then I stopped, most likely due to hunger. After coming up with a concern in game I was told to travel to the forums to discuss things there. The moment I stepped foot in the forums I knew it was the place for me."

- Lackluster

Conclusion
As you can see from this passage from Lackluster: An Autobiography, he is no ordinary fellow. This man is intrigued, nay, obsessed with the US WoW forums. For some time now he has occupied WoW General and posted like it was 1999. Most known for posting during the Night Crew hours (7p.m.EST-4a.m.EST). He haunts the General Forums making posts about absolutely nothing. Most would describe him a troll, other would describe him as an OT poster who happened to be lost, but we like to just call him a bit daft.

=Lackluster Facts=
 * "Lackluster should have his own Forum" - TImbal
 * Level 70 Male Unalive Priest.
 * "When he drinks water it squirts out his ribcage."
 * Belongs to the guild .
 * Makes sub par posts.
 * Once killed a shark with his bare hands.
 * Joined by Anir for crazy antics.
 * Receives an odd amount of ass-kissing. (Seriously, what's up with that?)
 * Has lobbied for gray text since he started posting.
 * Has no clue how to really make WoWWiki pages.
 * Is uncomfortably hot at the moment because of a lame AC.
 * Has tried to ride the wild Grizzly twice now, the first time cost him an eye, the second time cost him a finger.
 * Lackluster has been presented twice with a Nobel Peace prize for his award winning work in Monkey Science.
 * Has ridden the mighty moon worm.
 * Is running low on ideas.
 * Enjoys fabric softener.
 * Received a C- in spelling during Grade School.
 * Once was a cop in Miami.
 * Has made you read this much of his page.
 * Once drove a bus full of elderly folk off a cliff to escape the police. Amazingly no one was hurt.
 * Set his head a flame trying to pursue that 'fresh new look.'
 * Has pioneered his own grammar laws.
 * For a while was also John Malcovich.
 * Has been alive since the dawn of time.
 * Is made out of the same material as the magic school bus.
 * Has danced with four different Yeti on 3 different occasions.
 * Managed to five star Jordan his first time playing it while being blindfolded.
 * One night after eating a entire bucket of BUgles manged to paint an exact replica of "Starry Night."
 * Was once able to referrence 150 TV shows in one sentence.

=Eggsupreme's Contribution= " Lackluster was a normal boy like all the others when he was growing up in the town of Checkservech back in the old country many years ago. He then decided to have the American dream and play World of Warcraft. While on his adventure to America to play this game he came across many-a-friend such as Kre and Anir. Kre was conservative person who never said anything without reason and Anir was a crazy says-whatever-he-wants kind of person. They all decided to take a boat trip to America together one day. This would be soon interrupted by a Kraken destroying the boat and washing them ashore an unknown island. They then found a giant house there and, since they would surely die if they didnt go inside, they knocked on the door. A big hulking man answered. He was quite scary. He raised his fist with an angry look in his eye but before he could do anything another, less angry man, answered the door. He announced himself as Avjdl. Avjdl was a Hunter on that island who lived with the big hulking man. Lackluster introduced himself and his friends. Avjdl had heard of Lackluster and his great hunting abilities so he gave him a challenge. If Lackluster could outsmart Avjdl at his own little game he would help them leave the island and go off to America to play World of Warcraft. "

Appreciation
We'd like to acknowledge this contribution as one of scholarly merit. Thank you kind sir for your beautiful and stirring words.

=What Others Have To Say=
 * Q u o t e:
 * I'm trying not to post:


 * Because you touch yourself at night.


 * But I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out.


 * This is the most offensive and insensitive thing I have ever read in my entire life.


 * I have lost my faith in America, in God and in all that is holy and good.


 * You sir are surely as evil and as destructive as both Dungeons and Dragons and the Smurfs combined.


 * I would pray that Yahweh have mercy on your soul, but I fear the dark lords reprisal.


 * -Phtaadmon


 * Who is Lackluster?


 * -Nightravyn


 * You are Lackluster


 * We are all Lackluster


 * Wouldn't you like to be a Lackluster too?


 * -Andonsius


 * Lacking knowledge of oneself,


 * Can be the ultimate ballbuster,


 * For none possess more wealth


 * Than the immortal Lackluster!


 * -Elliralyn

=External Links= Too lazy. No external links exist. If you'd like to reach me, you'll find me on WoW General probably making a post that has very little sense.